Friday Five

1. What the ash? You might remember a post several weeks ago in which I told you about my upcoming trip to Iceland. Then…well, you know what happened then. I’ve been keeping track of Mother Nature in the North Atlantic. In addition to billowing clouds of ash, molten lava and projectile blocks of ice, the southeastern portion of the island (mostly farmland) is buried in inches of ash. It covers their homes, cars, and barns. It’s burrowing its way into the smallest of crevasses. So the hardy and lemons-into-lemonade Icelanders have found a solution. Sell the ash. That’s right. Bottle it up. Put it on the internet. Charge $30 and voila. You’ve just killed two birds with one stone.

2. Evidently I’ve been under a rock. I just learned about Celebrity Autobiography, a rather meta off-broadway production of celebrities reading autobiographies written by other celebrities. Performances have been going on for more than a year, featuring a round-robin of stars and books. Florence Henderson reading Madonna?! Richard Kind reading Vanna White?! John Leguizamo reading David Cassidy?! Rosie Perez reading The Poems of Suzanne Somers?! Do I even need to say how much I want to go to this show? Obviously the theme of the evening is not one of serious literature. But let me quote a line from Dave Barry when I say, “They are not making this up.” (In fact Dave Barry would probably be a hilarious reader.)
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3. From the department of gross…I was trimming Reggie’s nails (yes, I do it myself…yes, it’s challenging) and got my finger a little too close to the clipper. Then SNIP and @$&%*! I caught my finger in the clipper. Instantly blood started pooling under the skin, resulting in this. Even Reggie ran away from me.

4. And from the department of hmm…Octomom, Nadya Suleman, is now a spokesperson for PETA’s spay/neuter campaign. Does this reflect worse on PETA or Octomom?

5. I received an email from my company’s HR Training and Development Department. It started with a question: Why is it easier for some people to manage their emotions? Then the message heads into a discussion about the latest class they’re offering, which is Developing Your Emotional Intelligence. In this class, apparently, I can learn how emotional intelligence serves as a differentiating factor in being successful beyond one’s IQ. It’s a 6-hour class. This, they offer, yet I can’t get any instruction on FileMaker Pro. From the IT department, “You’re on your own.”

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